Unfortunate Events Paperbacks Available Now!!!

*Glances around the corner for flying cookies or confetti, seeing nothing, and steps into the room* Hello folk, we- *cue confetti, frisbee cookies, cupcakes like spaceships, and firecrackers*
Wow! Okay, boys, you can stop the bombardment!

Unfortunate Events is Released!!!

Woo-hoo!!!! *confetti cannons go off* *streamers fly across the room* *cookies are tossed like frisbees* Wait, what?